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Sommaire

• Tell it like it is

  Dear Mother:
  Without fear of contradiction, I can put
  my band on my heart and say we deeply regret any inconvenience caused due to our not having written before, but we are up to here with staff shonages and delays beyond our control caused by sleet on the points north of Didcot, not to mention the threatened dock-strike which had it not been avened at the eleventh hour, might have been just one more monal blow to the decimated tragedy that is Britain today. I trust you and Father are keeping well, remember four out of five so-called tension headaches are really due to constipation, know what I mean?

  par Alan Coren
• Lest we forget

  The 'Bipex' picture postcard exhibition reminds MAHOOD that cards have often been produced to commemorate great events

  par Mahood
• Owlers

  Two rare Snowy Owls stolen from Chessington Zoo were abandoned in a Croydon alley after two men failed to sell them at a London animal market.

  par Paul Jennings
• The Proper Study of Mankind?

  If your work consists of processing chickens and you suffer from warts, do not think that you have been forgotten.

  par Jonathan Sale